As salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu, This is my life…this is my world the way “I” see it. It may not be nice and most times it is not pretty. However, it is what it is. This is what I am looking for…to live my life…..and love it……..accept it…..the good the bad……and all the ugly. You heard of love the skin you in…..Well I wanna LOVE the Life Im in…..

Saturday, February 10, 2007

A new start

As salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

I have been thinking about starting a new blog for about 6 months now. So here it is. I have been reading many blogs and I am so sorry to say most of us women sound so sad. We complain, moan, and do nothing. We stay in our mess and and do nothing to fix it. I was one of thoese people. NO MORE!!!! Life is too short and too valuable to let it be wasted becuase things do not go my way. SO what our husbands have other wives. Does that mean he does not love us. NO! does that mean we are not GREAT women! NO! Does that make you less of a woman, wife, mother, person!!!! NO, STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF! embrace it or change it. So what!!!! So what he may not be the best husband. We have a choice. DIVORCE! If you chose to stay with him then dont stay in the same situation, FIX IT.
I was like this. Last year my husband got a new wife. I was so depressed. I just thought he was going to change and my life was over. I even left himI was so miserable. YOu know what. HE did change, for the better and you know what That wife is gone. And I am still here. Yes he remarried, however that has not changed what WE have. I did all the stuff all of us do. I went throught the emotions all of us go through. I still do. I still feel sad at times. I still wonder why I cannotbe the only wife. But now I dont let it control me. That is the difference. I will NOT allow him to change me. He does not have that control anymore. I gave that all up to Allah.

The thing is I had to see there is one thing I can not change my husband. He will always want women. That is in him. HE will alwasy have 2 wives and if he could afford it 4. I had to accept this. Men think, feel, and just are different than us. They need to feel the power, the control and the excitment. We just look for the love. We need to feel secure. So I am making him change his actions towards me. I am retraing him, lol.... Why should he be th eonly one gettign his needs met. Why should he get to go from house to house and just feel like king of the world and I get sucked dry!! Is that fair??? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, so I am telling him my needs and tellign him what I need from him to make ME happy. I told him Ok, YOu need wives, I need a GOOD, STRONG, ISLAMICLY SOUND, husband. If we chosse to be married then this si what I need for this to work. So far he is changing. Yes, he slips and I want to knowck him inthe head or i will cry. but now i dont let it overtake me. I dont run and just want a divorce. I go back and try again. I remeber he is only human.

Well this is my first of insha'Allah many posts.


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