MOMMY and ME TIME
MY MOMMY IS HERE!!!!!
I am so happy to see her. My kids and I will be showing her all the sites. We will inshallah have tons of heart to hearts and special moments. I want to just LOVE her while she is here. She is so proud of me. She LOVED my house. When we pulled up. she said YOU LIVE HERE!! her eyes popped out. She said no way... She came in and just hugged me. Told me she is proud of me and thanked me for everything and told me I am the best daughter she could ask for. WEll I am her only child so she cant compare......lol....... But it is so nice to feel loved....right now when the person I loved is not loving me. But I have moved on
well I have wonderful loving friends
ever since I told people about the end of my marriage. i have been gettign so much attention. Men want to met with me when my time is up. This time has flown. I am noot ready for that but it sure helps my heart.
I feel like I can live again. I do have options if I choose. Right now I choose my kids. Men will come later. I know I WILL get married again because I NEED to be married. TOOOOO many hormones jumping off.
BuT I can wait.
My birthday is next week..... Inshaallah I will talk my mom on a trip. Her birthday is the 4 and mine is the 1 of Nvember. I wish It was Ummerah, so sad to have her so close to Saudi and not be able to go. Inshaallah oneday.
My job is going well, I just went to a PD for 3 days. I tell you Every time my job sends us somewhere I gain weight. They feed us soo well and put us in the swankiest hotels, This is what my kids say when we pull up.SWANKIE I just love them. " YES, I take my kids with me. They find things to do and keep busy while I work." Now I am going to have to work this weight off. 2 lbs in 3 days.....wow.....
I am sorry if this offends anyone. I say that becasue i know many people do not listen to music.
However I LOVE IT. That is my one true vice.
anyway, I was listening too a song .......no more drama....oh HOw that hit home.
NO MORE pain
NO MORE PAIN
NO MORE DRAMA IN MY LIFE
NO MORE GAMES MESSIN WITH MY MIND
IT FEELS SO GOOD WHEN YOU LET GO OF ALL THE DRAMA IN YOUR LIFE
NOW I AM FREE FROM ALL THE GAME
FREE FROM ALL THE PAIN
FREE FROM ALL THE STRESS
SO FIND SOME HAPPINESS
I DONT KNOW ONLY GOD KNOWS WHERE THIS STORY ENDS FOR ME
BUT I KNOW WHERE THIS STORY BEGINS
ITS UP FOR US TO CHOOSE WEATHER WE WIN OR LOSE
AND I CHOOSE TO WIN
TO MORE FEARS
IM TIRED OF CRYING EVERYNIGHT
NO MORE TEARS
I REALLY DONT WANT TO FIGHT
NO DRAMA
NO MORE DRAMS IN MY LIFE NO ONES GONNA MAKE ME HURT AGAIN
Maybe I needed to do this to find myself
but I tell u I am loving her and
"PM"
YES, EXHALE
it feels so good
holding it in for so long almost killed me
Let it all go
it feels sssooooo goood
I am so happy to see her. My kids and I will be showing her all the sites. We will inshallah have tons of heart to hearts and special moments. I want to just LOVE her while she is here. She is so proud of me. She LOVED my house. When we pulled up. she said YOU LIVE HERE!! her eyes popped out. She said no way... She came in and just hugged me. Told me she is proud of me and thanked me for everything and told me I am the best daughter she could ask for. WEll I am her only child so she cant compare......lol....... But it is so nice to feel loved....right now when the person I loved is not loving me. But I have moved on
well I have wonderful loving friends
ever since I told people about the end of my marriage. i have been gettign so much attention. Men want to met with me when my time is up. This time has flown. I am noot ready for that but it sure helps my heart.
I feel like I can live again. I do have options if I choose. Right now I choose my kids. Men will come later. I know I WILL get married again because I NEED to be married. TOOOOO many hormones jumping off.
BuT I can wait.
My birthday is next week..... Inshaallah I will talk my mom on a trip. Her birthday is the 4 and mine is the 1 of Nvember. I wish It was Ummerah, so sad to have her so close to Saudi and not be able to go. Inshaallah oneday.
My job is going well, I just went to a PD for 3 days. I tell you Every time my job sends us somewhere I gain weight. They feed us soo well and put us in the swankiest hotels, This is what my kids say when we pull up.SWANKIE I just love them. " YES, I take my kids with me. They find things to do and keep busy while I work." Now I am going to have to work this weight off. 2 lbs in 3 days.....wow.....
I am sorry if this offends anyone. I say that becasue i know many people do not listen to music.
However I LOVE IT. That is my one true vice.
anyway, I was listening too a song .......no more drama....oh HOw that hit home.
NO MORE pain
NO MORE PAIN
NO MORE DRAMA IN MY LIFE
NO MORE GAMES MESSIN WITH MY MIND
IT FEELS SO GOOD WHEN YOU LET GO OF ALL THE DRAMA IN YOUR LIFE
NOW I AM FREE FROM ALL THE GAME
FREE FROM ALL THE PAIN
FREE FROM ALL THE STRESS
SO FIND SOME HAPPINESS
I DONT KNOW ONLY GOD KNOWS WHERE THIS STORY ENDS FOR ME
BUT I KNOW WHERE THIS STORY BEGINS
ITS UP FOR US TO CHOOSE WEATHER WE WIN OR LOSE
AND I CHOOSE TO WIN
TO MORE FEARS
IM TIRED OF CRYING EVERYNIGHT
NO MORE TEARS
I REALLY DONT WANT TO FIGHT
NO DRAMA
NO MORE DRAMS IN MY LIFE NO ONES GONNA MAKE ME HURT AGAIN
Maybe I needed to do this to find myself
but I tell u I am loving her and
"PM"
YES, EXHALE
it feels so good
holding it in for so long almost killed me
Let it all go
it feels sssooooo goood
posted by Livin_life_and loving_it @ 8:20 AM
3 Comments:
At 6:12 PM,
PM said…
GOD BLESS YOU! GOD BLESS YOU! AND GOD BLESS YOUR MOTHER AND CHILDREN!
You deserve every bit of it, dear one. I hope I can get to the stage where I feel like I deserve goodness in my life. The depression prevents that but I am working on that part, too.
You don't know how much hope this post gave me. I wish I could reach out and give you a hug. Maybe I'll get to AD or you'll get to Doha and that will happen.
Love you,
PM
At 9:10 PM,
Safa said…
YAY!! Ur Mommy is with you!!! Make sure when you celebrate our Bday that you say Happy Bday to me too, okay? Talk about strange weirdness. What's the chance of us having the same bday? Like...what....1 in 365?? HAHAHA!!!!
Anyhoo...enjoy your time....I'm so happy for you...
At 8:01 AM,
Livin_life_and loving_it said…
PM I know about depression and anxiety attacks. I have them often. However, I swear i feel good. Usually when he is nt here. I amm sick . I am depressed, cant sleep, take pills for anxiety. This time, please!!!! I have had trouble sleeping maybe 3-4 day. but no pills and not one attack. Even though I miss him .....at times and that is getting less and less. I am not stressing over him. I have come to see that HE was the cause f my stress and anxiety. HE was the reason I was sick. I used to think he helped me and talked me throughthem, but I now know that if it was not for him I would never have the attacks in the first place. I feel inner peace. I do not know how to explain it. Yeah I get pissed when I think fo what happened but then I think........I am so better off with out him. I am so much happier. I will never have to deal with that crap again.
One day, Inshaallah, You will be able to let it go and feel free too. I dont know when or how it happened but it just did. I am free for the first time in YEARS! WOW! no going back for me.
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