As salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu, This is my life…this is my world the way “I” see it. It may not be nice and most times it is not pretty. However, it is what it is. This is what I am looking for…to live my life…..and love it……..accept it…..the good the bad……and all the ugly. You heard of love the skin you in…..Well I wanna LOVE the Life Im in…..

Monday, October 29, 2007

New Day

I woke up this morning in such a good mood. I have not felt this good in ........Forever. I just felt good about myself my life and my choices I made. Alhumduillah, things are going well. I think for what I could be doing or how I could be feeling and I know this is truely a mercy from Allah.

I have made a decision to spend at least 6 months working on me. I want to lose my weight. I tell you I have had the energy and desire to lose it. I mean I WANT to get on this bike and all the other things that used to be a chore for me to do. I want to read more; I have always loved reading but ............ I want to spend more time studying Islam. I want to memorize some more Surahs. I also want to just enjoy being single.

I do get lonely. I miss my ex-husband at times. Our talks, laughing, just having his leg on mine at night...However, I do not miss him enough to want to have him back in my life. I know, Inshaallah, I will replace him with a better man.......IF I CHOOSE. I am human and I do have desires and needs but I will never settle. I will not just accept anything or anyone ever again.

This is such a special time in my life. I love living. I love my kids..... I am just happy. I feel like I am in love. You knw that high feeling you get when love is new. This is how I feel. The thing is there is no man making me feel this way........ this time it is all about me. I am just loving myslef. WOW!!!!!!!!

HA, You are in my prayers. I read your blog and Loved it.
PM, I wish this feeling for you, Inshaallah one day you will feel this and let the happiness in. Smetimes it is such a hard thing for us to do. Accept and recieve goodness and happiness. Just remember YOU DESERVE IT!!!


  • At 6:19 PM, Blogger PM said…

    Sweet Lolly!

    You are such a guiding light for me and I strive to recah the point you are at. I know it takes time and I have to go through each phase but it sure does help to know it can get a whole lot better.

    Something that really haleps me is having a job I love and I see we are sisters in that sense, as well as so many others. That can really be a self-esteem lifter -- as can the knwoledge that your ex isn't the ONLY man in the world! just teasing you with that last part ;-)

    God Bless you and yours,

  • At 7:09 PM, Blogger Livin_life_and loving_it said…

    I know you were joking but it i sso true. Smetimes we feel that they are we deserve or all we CAn get so we settle. We deny ourselves anyother possibiulty of happiness because they are still around and blocking our TRUE hapiness. And true happiness can be with or without a man, but it is ours to enjoy. It is ours to have. I feel like i wasted time and energy thinking and feeling HE was all I could get or would get because i am old, have kids, not thin or what ever, but right now I am like who cares!!!! I am happy with me. I am IN LOVE with me!!!

  • At 4:19 AM, Blogger Relief said…

    Salamu alaykum Dear Sister,

    Thanks for coming to my blog and extending the hand of friendship. Al hamdulilaah sisterhood is not truly dead yet! I'm in the ATL in the USA a transplant as I'm not from here and hope to leave soon as it is truly the Bible Belt.

    I lived in Ajman for a year in 1998. Were you there then? I remember meeting a sister who taught at a school there. Do you know Umm Musab? Anyway I'm glad to see that you are finding your relief through the pain of your divorce. May Allah bless you with all that is good. Ameen.


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