New MONTH
I am starting a new way of looking at things. I dont know how long it will last but I will try this out for a while.
I will not bother with things that do not concern me.
meaning I will not allow my husband to talk about his wife wiht me. No talkign about bringing her here, no talks about what he ate for dinner, no talks about going anywhere nothing about his life there.
When he is here I will focus on only us. I will not allow him to talk to her while i am at home. I work 10 hrs a day that is enought time for him to talk to her ont he phone, computer or whatever they want to do. My time is for me.
I will not compare what he does with her vs what he does with me. We have seperate lives and very different lives.
Deep down i love my life. I do not want to trade anything except my co wife.........lol..... i will be greatful for what i have
i will be happy with what i have and do ot have.
I will think good thoughts
not things that will hurt me
like i said this may only last a day but who knows it may just work. if it doesnot at least i tried.
I will not bother with things that do not concern me.
meaning I will not allow my husband to talk about his wife wiht me. No talkign about bringing her here, no talks about what he ate for dinner, no talks about going anywhere nothing about his life there.
When he is here I will focus on only us. I will not allow him to talk to her while i am at home. I work 10 hrs a day that is enought time for him to talk to her ont he phone, computer or whatever they want to do. My time is for me.
I will not compare what he does with her vs what he does with me. We have seperate lives and very different lives.
Deep down i love my life. I do not want to trade anything except my co wife.........lol..... i will be greatful for what i have
i will be happy with what i have and do ot have.
I will think good thoughts
not things that will hurt me
like i said this may only last a day but who knows it may just work. if it doesnot at least i tried.
posted by Livin_life_and loving_it @ 7:33 AM
2 Comments:
At 4:56 PM,
Anonymous said…
May Allaah rectify your situation and grant you and your whole family khair in this life as well as your hereafter, Allahumma Ameen....
Alhamdulillah you've decided to change your way of looking at things. I hope everything works out for you.
Thinking about things that hurts you is from the shaitan. Dont worry about your husbands other life, work on yalls marriage and forget the rest. May Allaah grant you ease in your situation and bring your family together. ameen.
At 10:30 AM,
Safa said…
You know honey....I was doing the same thing...but u know what? It's TOTALLY unsatisfying not being able to talk to ur hubby openly. Basically, u put him in a corner where you talk and talk...and then when it comes his turn....what's he gonna say? His life becomes CLOSED. And u know? If ur like me, with 16 yrs of marriage....and at least 14 yrs of sharing EVERYTHING...all of a sudden u feel very excluded. And it more than hurts...it burns.
I'm also big on the being fair issue....so if you don't want him talking to her when he's with u....(and GOD help u...I hope that works....I've tried that one for over a year....it never works)....then I'm from the opinion....that you should respect the same thing. Now I think I remember u saying that his wife doesn't work, right? So u gotta work out an acceptable time.....and not stray outside of it.....
I tried doing that as well with my co wife....but she purposely was calling us at 1:30 am...12 am....u name it. She's a different breed.
I've made lots of rules, and seem to always be the one who is following them. Basically, I"m at this point now where I've given up. It's done....I don't see me having anything else to give without getting SOMETHING back.....so I'll just have this baby...and if my situation is the same....I'm packing up.
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